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Mark 10:2-16

² And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” ³ He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” ⁴ They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.” ⁵ And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. ⁶ But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ⁷ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, ⁸ and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. ⁹ What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

¹⁰ And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. ¹¹ And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, ¹² and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

¹³ And they were bringing children to him that he might touch them, and the disciples rebuked them. ¹⁴ But when Jesus saw it, he was indignant and said to them, “Let the children come to me; do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. ¹⁵ Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.” ¹⁶ And he took them in his arms and blessed them, laying his hands on them.

Grace, mercy, and peace to you from God our Father and from our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Amen.

[Married couples, I want you to be touching each other during this sermon. Hold hands, have your arm around your spouse’s shoulder, or place a hand on their leg. I’ll trust you to keep it rated “G.” I know your kids might make it impossible to do this through the whole sermon, but do your best. Couples, I want you to digest this sermon together. If you get distracted by your kids through the sermon, listen to it again tonight. So you know, I will forgo my normal Sunday night routine and do this with my wife tonight. God bless you and your marriage. To you who are not married, listen as well. God has some important things to say to you as you consider marriage in the future.]

In the name of Jesus. Amen.

This Gospel text is not primarily about marriage. This text is about the Pharisees trying to dig up some mud that they can throw at Jesus based on what He will say about divorce. So, unless marriage is about divorce (and it’s not), this text is not primarily about marriage. However, that being said, Jesus does, in this text, give us God’s definitive word about marriage. With all the talk in our day and culture about marriage and the definition of marriage, this sermon will talk about God’s creation of marriage.

If you want to know what God has to say about marriage, you have to go where Jesus tells you to go. “From the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’” If you want to know what God’s intent for His creation of marriage is, you have to go back to the beginning of creation – back to before the Fall into sin.

This is marriage. God created Adam with a complete, self-sufficient cardiovascular system that could function on its own. Adam’s digestive system was created good and complete in itself to give Adam the nutrients and sustenance he needed. Adam’s skeletal and muscular systems were created good and complete in themselves to keep him upright and moving. But God’s good creation left Adam incomplete in one way – Adam could not reproduce by himself. God, in His great wisdom, intentionally left Adam unable to propagate on his own. God created Adam to need a helper. God brought all the animals to Adam so Adam could name them, but in all those beasts of the field, birds of the air, and fish of the sea, no suitable helper was fit.

So God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and God took one of Adam’s ribs from his side. God took that rib and used it to make a woman. God brings the woman to Adam, and she is like nothing else that Adam has seen. When Adam sees what God has done with his rib, he says, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” And she was, literally. Adam said, “This one shall be called woman because she was taken out of man.”

Pause here for a brief Hebrew lesson: The Hebrew word for ‘man’ is אִישׁ (ish), and the Hebrew word that Adam gives to this new creation of God is אִשָּׁה (isha). So the difference between man and woman is, as one Hebrew scholar puts it, “Ahh.” When Adam sees his wife that is the idea that is going through his mind. “Ahh. This is the one for me.” And Adam receives his אִשָּׁה as God’s good gift to him.

In our Old Testament text (Gen. 2:18-25), we hear Moses write that this is God’s intent, God’s design for marriage. Marriage is created by God and defined by God. Marriage is not a man and a woman falling in love and choosing to work, live, and make children together. Marriage is something God does. As God united Adam and Eve together before the Fall, God still unites a man and a woman together to be husband and wife and those two become one flesh. One + one = one. The “one flesh” union of husband and wife is not the sexual act, rather the natural fruit of the sexual act, children. That is why what our Supreme Court ruled is contrary to God’s created order. So-called “gay marriage” is not, cannot be, and never will be marriage. One man + one man or one woman + one woman = two men or two women, but never marriage. And that’s all I’m going to say about that because that is all Scripture has to say about it.

As Jesus quotes and explains from our Old Testament text, “’Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” The important thing in marriage is not what a husband vows and promises to do for his wife nor what a wife vows and promises to do for her husband. What is of lasting importance is what God promises to both the husband and the wife: God is acting; God is uniting; God is joining. What God joins, let not man separate.

The Pharisees want to test Jesus; they want people to turn against Him. They are trying to trip Jesus up by bringing up the controversial topic of divorce. The Pharisees had two schools of thought on divorce. One group of Pharisees taught that divorce was wrong except in cases of adultery, and the other group taught that divorce could take place for very menial reasons – like the wife burning her husband’s toast or the man simply finding a prettier woman. Jesus knows their motives and asks them, “What did Moses command you?”

The Pharisees point to Deut. 24:1-4 where Moses does indeed write about what is required when a man divorces his wife. Moses does indeed say that a man needs to do the appropriate paperwork in order to divorce his wife, but this was an act of mercy for the divorced woman. In Moses’ day, a man could divorce his wife and kick her out of his tent, but unlike today, a woman could not divorce her husband. In Moses’ day, if a woman was divorced, she didn’t have an opportunity to provide for herself and would starve. And she couldn’t get married again because everyone else would see her as someone else’s wife. So Moses instructed the hard-hearted people, “If you’re going to throw your wife out, if you are going to make a mess, don’t make a mess for your wife’s life. The lest you can do is give her a certificate of divorce so that she could possibly marry again.”

And Jesus picks up on exactly that. Divorce happens only because a sin and hardness of heart. Jesus tells the Pharisees, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses wrote this.” In other words, Jesus is saying, “Divorce is always contrary to God’s design for marriage. Moses only wrote that to clean up the messes that your sinfulness makes. Here is God’s intent: what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

Jesus is very clear here. It doesn’t matter if the person you chose to marry was not a good choice. God joined you together. God made you and your spouse to be one flesh. So, husbands and wives, hear this: Your love for your spouse is not enough to sustain your marriage. Don’t look at your marriage as your choice. Rather, look at your marriage as something God has done. In your marriage, God joins you to your spouse to help you, to serve you, to do for you what you cannot do for yourself. Husbands, God places you into the unique office of husband. Wives, God places you into the unique office of wife. Adam did not make Eve his wife – he couldn’t have because she didn’t exist. Instead, Adam received Eve as God’s unique gift to him. And married couples, your spouse is God’s gift to you; your marriage is God’s gift to you. Again, your love for your spouse is not enough to sustain your marriage, but in God’s mercy, your marriage can sustain your love for each other.

Again, God’s math for marriage is this: one man + one woman = one flesh, and that means babies.

Now, to those of you who are not married yet, remember all of this. If you find a person you think you might want to marry, that is a good thing. But once you are married, remember that God has united you. You have not joined yourself to your spouse – God has. So, if you have differences in worldview or doctrine, that is going to cause problems because you and your spouse are both hardhearted and sinful. The devil, the world, and your own sinful flesh will attack your marriage because it is a work of God. The devil, the world, and your sinful flesh hate the works of God. Do not let anything attack your marriage.

And everyone, married couples and single people, know this: Jesus is the only one who will create, maintain, and build this unity. Jesus literally became bone of your bones and flesh of your flesh. Jesus became man. He united Himself to you so that you could be His Bride, a believer, a member of His Church. He takes on your flesh so that He can stand between you and God. He stands there to receive God’s wrath against your sin. When God punishes Jesus, it is the same as punishing you. When Jesus is obedient to God’s commands and lives a righteous life, it is the same as you obeying all of God’s commands and living a perfect, holy, righteous life.

Jesus comes here again to confirm to you that He has become one flesh with you. He gives His body, His flesh and unites Himself to you in Communion. Jesus gives His holy and precious blood to you to forgive you of your sin, to remove your hardheartedness. Because of this meal, your sin, all of your sin, is forgiven. If you want to strengthen your marriage, come to communion together as husband and wife where together you are joined to your Husband, Jesus Christ. Come to this altar where your sinfulness is replaced with the righteousness and holiness of your true Husband, Jesus Christ. Amen.

The peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Amen.